My People

As social beings, we can’t live alone; we all need other people in our lives. Having other people, like friends and family, is a must for us humans. From them, we can gain things that we can’t always give to ourselves. Emotional support, connection, feelings, and different perspectives when facing problems are some examples. When going through a crisis, you might even need more than one person, this is where your support system comes in.

A support system is a group of people you can rely on when going through tough times; your safe space. “My People” is what I like to call them. Also, keep in mind that a relationship/friendship always goes both ways, or in this case, all ways. This means that you, too, have to be there for them when they need you.

Anyway, now all that’s left to do is to find your support system. Here are a few ways you can try to find your people:

1. Family

They’re the people who know you best and you’re closest to. After a long day, they’re the ones you go home to and can lean on. But other than your closest family, like your mom and dad, you can also try contacting other family members. If you feel more comfortable ranting to people your own age, try talking to cousins that are your age.

2. School Friends

This might be the simplest way for you to find your support system since you go to school and meet your friends everyday. Even if you’re a new student in a new school, you can make new friends. Don’t rush anything, you can slowly and steadily build your friendship. Once you get to know them and feel safe around them, you can open up and try to connect with each other on a deeper level.

3. Interests

You can take lessons that are of your interest. Given that the people you’ll meet in those lessons have the same hobby as you, you’ll probably be able to connect and feel comfortable when you talk to each other. You may even find other similarities, so you keep contacting them regularly. Sooner or later, your friendship will grow and you’ll feel close enough to them for you to open up more.

4. Joining Groups

Groups here mean something more specific. For example, if you’re trying to exercise regularly and you need external motivation from other people, you can join a group that has the same goal as you. Because they’re going through the same thing as you, they can understand and relate to you more, and can give you the support you need.

Lastly, before you open up to other people, make sure you know and trust them. And always remember to keep a positive and healthy relationship/friendship with each other. If it ever gets tough or maybe even toxic, be sure to communicate it first, so there won’t be any misunderstandings. Communication and trust is key. Anyway, good luck finding your people!!

Written by: Gwen Kezia/ XI SOS 1